Don’t say I didn’t remind you of the leaf sucking protocol for 2019.


The city’s leaf removal protocol for 2019 is to petition Superman, and he’ll take care of it all by himself. Actual quoted passage:

“Mayor Jeff Gahan is pleased to once again aid the citizens of New Albany with leaf removal.”

Well, he’s the Wizard of Bling, and he can do ANYTHING.

Of course it’s the stormwater utility’s employees who’ll be doing the actual work, like always, but naturally this doesn’t stop Anchor City’s narcissist-in-chief from claiming credit for the labor of others. After all, that’s why he’s here.

But don’t look for the information at the city’s web site.

Don’t look for these, either, or Bob Caesar will set your leaves on fire.

Rather, the lowdown comes with the stormwater utility’s periodic paean to Dear Leader’s re-election campaign.

Short version: If you want your leaves sucked, keep them out of the curbs, gutters and streets, or else … absolutely nothing will happen to you.