Deaf Gahan vows to save Woodstock 50: “We’ll TIF that bad boy right into Bicentennial Park.”

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In a hurried pajama-clad press conference adjacent to Mark Seabrook’s house, Gahan vowed to raze public housing over the weekend if enough space could be cleared for Woodstock 50 to be held on Bono Road.

“Like we’ve said all along,” intoned Dear Leader, “our TIF zones are healthy, and as we all know, music festivals as economic development generate big-time donor kickbacks from the Port-A-Let suppliers.”

Michael Lang was unavailable for comment.

Woodstock 50 Organizers “Considering All Options” After Unanimous Permit Rejection, by Madison Bloom (Pitchfork)

The fate of the festival, originally slated to take place August 16-18, remains unknown

Woodstock 50 has issued a new statement on the status of the festival. In an email to Pitchfork, a Woodstock 50 spokesperson said that the event organizers are “considering all options at this point.”

The 50th anniversary of the iconic 1969 festival—slated to take place August 16-18—has encountered multiple setbacks since it was announced back in January. In April, ticket sales were delayed following the festival’s failure to obtain a required permit from the New York State Department of Health (DOH). Later that month, investors Dentsu Aegis Network pulled financial support, announcing that the festival had been called off.

In the months since those initial hurdles, Woodstock 50 has entered a legal battle with Dentsu, lost its event producer and original venue in Watkins Glen, New York, and was denied a permit for a new venue at Vernon Downs. On Tuesday (July 16), the town of Vernon voted unanimously to reject an appeal by festival organizers following the denied permit application. It marked the third attempt by the festival to move to Vernon Downs race track.

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