Top Ten posts at NA Confidential for April 2018.

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Duggins Does (Did) Micro-Lofts, too.

Thanks for reading NA Confidential, where we enjoy reconnoitering the neglected periphery for uniquely local perspectives on life in New Albany.

City Hall’s allegations to the contrary, it can be grasped quite clearly that hundreds of you are reading, and we believe this fact attests to a keen ongoing interest in grassroots New Albany stories, perhaps because they’re being chronically under-served elsewhere. After all, fawning stenography and inexorably multiplying religion columnists can get a newspaper only so far.

That said, numbers were down a bit in April, which isn’t unusual for this time of year. The April list begins with ten “honorable mention” posts, before concluding with the Top Ten, escalating to No. 1. These statistics are derived from Google’s internal accounting.

APRIL HONORABLE MENTION (10)

404

Your turn, buster — or, this isn’t the usual rant about potholes.

I’m eternally fascinated by the notion that potholes, as a specific minority subset of broader street and highway conditions, can be relied upon to trigger endless, intemperate diatribes and vitriolic rants of the sort that almost never greet so many structural inadequacies (water, health care, sanitation, affordable housing) that impact the living conditions of humans when they’re not inside their cars.

413

This photo collage shows the incredible transformation of the Pints & Union building at 114 E. Market.

430

What’s the highest elected office attained by an African-American in New Albany and Floyd County government?

“What’s the highest elected office attained by an African-American in New Albany and Floyd County government?”

434

The CJ’s remarkably consistent terminal decline: No news in the Indiana Newsletter, and plenty of blue-bagged litter to clog the city’s storm drains.

Friday was the 4th straight day of a Romeo Langford college choice story with top billing in the CJ’s “Indiana Newsletter,” finally supplanted today by the opioid crisis, another recurring chestnut that at least constitutes genuine news. This vacuous irrelevance was accompanied by a fresh spate of unwanted blue-wrapped street spam.

446 (tie)

A sampling of new windows, paint and facades in downtown New Albany.

446 (tie)

SweetFrog: “Please help save your only frozen treat option in New Albany.”

We love downtown New Albany and everything it’s about. I mentioned opening a small business is hard-not only is it financially hard, but emotionally as well when you put your heart and soul into something that you truly believe can bring happiness to a community in the form of a healthier sweet treat and then have it potentially taken away. We truly hope that we are able to continue to stay open give you the best Froyo experience you’ve ever had.

464

True colors: A Pints & Union visual update.

500

It’s déjà vu all over again as the NAHA and New Hope ask the BZA for variances to build housing units in three locations near West Street.

And, given the lengthy bureaucratic process involved, I’m also going to guess that these unusual non-demolition projects fell into David Duggins’ lap (dance) courtesy of former NAHA director Bob Lane, who took me on a tour one day a few years ago and pointed out these pieces of property as future building sites.

In short, the colonizing forces would seem to be following the pre-existing plan put together by the deposed Lane. Consequently, I’m issuing a Gahan Personality Cult Alert (GPCA), and you should be on the lookout for the mayor and his vicious sycophantic lickspittles taking credit for someone else’s work.

504

ON THE AVENUES: New Albany’s downtown food and dining scene is solid … for now.

It’s too strong of a reaction to conclude that downtown suddenly is in retreat. I’m hardly a serial optimist, but it’s premature to begin issuing doom-laden pronouncements about bubbles bursting.

507

Even Pinocchio figured it out, so get those political signs out of the verge and into your yard.

People, this isn’t nuclear physics. Keep your touts off the verge, and no signs get hurt.

525

Exciting news from Schmitt Furniture: “All of our buildings are to have new windows installed, including the currently covered windows.”

APRIL TOP TEN

577

Floyd County Democrats reveal council president Knable’s responsibility for brush fires, potholes and a mistaken school lock-down. He may have voted the GOP candidates, too.

Speaking on behalf of Gahan4Mayor personnel Friday, New Albany Police Chief Todd Bailey cleared up the incident:

“After an extensive investigation into Knable’s household trash bin, including the building inspector’s inspections of his house’s wiring and HVAC, we learned President Knable ate an apple, not a banana, as he previously claimed.”

606

Read township trustee candidate Steve Burks’ statement about affordable housing in New Albany.

“That being said I am opposed to any displacement of individuals without a comprehensive plan to ‘help’ individuals with the basic necessity of affordable living. I use the term living on purpose because it is more than just a roof over a person. Living means being engaged in the community to make it a better place for all the citizens of New Albany. We are God’s creation and should be treated with dignity and respect.”

608

From Colokial to DADA in two blocks or less, with a sideways glance at DNA’s tacky mobster tactics.

The upshot: Colokial closes so its owner can transition to a different business model, and DADA moves from Underground Station into the vacated Colokial space because it needs more square footage, leaving behind an affordable slot that might be regarded as an incubator, or become the permanent location of a niche business.

It all makes perfect sense. To reiterate thoughts expressed in this space after Feast BBQ and Comfy Cow recently closed, downtown must be viewed as a dynamic in progress. As long as usable spaces are being occupied, there’s nothing much else to say, and there’ll be steps forward and backward. The aim is to keep moving forward.

617

The shrinking remnants of Moser Tannery can’t take much more of this strange “love” from Team Gahan.

The fire was the second in the vicinity of the tannery since early March, when a late-model industrial warehouse adjacent to the remaining brick building went up in flames.

Is it just me, or has the abuse of the tannery site — graffiti, vandalism, garbage and fires — escalated noticeably since City Hall (ahem) took control?

654

10 years ago today, Barack Obama was in New Albany.

It was April 23, 2008, and presidential candidate Barack Obama was in New Albany, Indiana. Not only did Obama go on to become the first ever African-American president, but he even won the state of Indiana in the general election that November.

In short, it was a thousand years ago.

684

Read Dan Canon’s statement about the issue of public housing in New Albany.

Abuse of the poor and the vulnerable is not, and has never been, a purely partisan affliction. We can combat such abuses with vigilance, which is the promise of We Are New Albany. I can make that promise as well. The good people in my hometown deserve as much. We will be watching.

796

LIVE TO EAT on THE BEER BEAT: A tribute to the late Rocky’s Sub Pub and a question: What’s happening at Jeffersonville’s “restaurant row”?

It was announced today that Rocky’s Sub Pub, on the riverfront in Jeffersonville, suddenly closed. Danielle Grady’s newspaper coverage is linked below, but first, a short piece I wrote for LEO back in 2009, when Rocky’s debuted its beefed-up tap system. Ironically, now both Rocky’s and JeffBoat are gone.

1,095

Is last year’s two-way street grid build-out to blame for a business slowdown? “Six months of confusing traffic patterns during peak season really put a lot of people in the hole.”

“Great! I heard the rumors … never heard the plan. I wanted two-way streets before and I want them now, and I love the two-way. Two-way streets are great for downtown, and I’m a big fan of them — but here’s the part that no one knew or had any input on. The conversion would put confusing cones, confusing lines, confusing signs, confusing lights all around us while all confusingly contradicting one other.”

1,210

LIVE TO EAT: “7 steps to try before resorting to a bad review on Yelp.”

Accordingly, the reason for the one-star take-down from the clueless American, which occurred a few weeks before our excellent experience, was that he came to the Taberna Stº. António without a reservation, it was fully booked with no available tables, and so BOOM, a negative review: how dare they not have space to seat us? How can you give a bad review to a place you haven’t even entered?

1,383

Lancaster-themed “Micro Lofts” soon will inhabit Duggins’ anchor wasteland at the corner of Market and Vincennes.

If there isn’t a solid chicken-fried steak with requisite non-lumpy milk gravy coming out of one of the eateries in this planned “Lancaster nostalgia” development — think of it as Break Wind Too — then all the retro branding will have been in vain.

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